Now it's time for a brief discourse on "relationship stuff." I hear some of you groan, but I hear others of you lick your chops; this is more real than reality tv, soap operas, and your Harlequin novels and you like it.

now playing: "Living for the City" by Stevie Wonder. Great song, very funky. Once that's done (and before I'm done writing this update, since I'm taking brief 2 minute breaks here and there) it will be the latest album by His Name Is Alive, Last Night.

The breakup was on a Sunday night just before the New Year. I don't have an exact date, but I'm sure it is out there somewhere. A few days later I sent her an email to which she never responded. I'm trying hard not to be bitter so I'll just forego commenting further on what that says about her. I suppose what is bothering me most is that I don't want to admit that maybe she isn't as great as I idealized her to be and it's hard to admit to any degree of blindness. It's also not fun to admit you've been rejected. Anyway, she still has a couple things of mine and I have a tube of glue she let me borrow. I emailed her earlier this week and asked what sort of arrangement would work out best for her (since she has no car). She emailed back and said we should get together at noon on Saturday at a local pizza place. I'm not sure if she has lunch in mind or if this just happens to be a landmark she knows I know. I'm not planning on lunch. I'm also a little put off by the fact that she clearly chose a "neutral" location; it's as if she doesn't trust me or thinks I'll attack her or something. I honestly do feel insulted. I'm generally very easy-going and give people the benefit of the doubt; however, she made constant dissertations on how what people do and say shows her quite a bit about their character and who they are and what their motivations are, to the point where I couldn't say a word without her telling me I meant something I didn't by it. Then when I would try to explain myself (note: Idealists are constantly misunderstood and have a difficulty explaining themselves sometimes--when I started telling her about temperament things she told me she knew all about it and had studied it and was really past that in her understanding--yet she didn't understand this in working with me. hmmm), she would constantly interrupt and tell me that it didn't matter what I said, she knew what I meant to say (though when she told me what I meant to say, it didn't match up very well with what was in my head). Anyway, I explain all that to say that with as much emphasis she puts on knowing motives, and as gifted as she claims to be in doing this, the same standard automatically applies to her, doesn't it? As a result, it's safe to say that there's some specific reason behind this and it's not exactly complimentary. This is weird for me because I'm generally the one telling someone "Oh, I'm sure ___ means nothing by it; he/she probably doesn't realize how it comes across." Shoot, I've put up with people screaming at me and physically assaulting me for those reasons (heh, never again); I suppose this falls under the idea that to those who apply a higher standard, the higher standard applies.
Anyway, enough of that.