hey, time for a sporadic update, kids.

well, in the "how the hell did that happen" category....i like someone like *that* and she likes me like *that*.
this whole thing is really great. i think it's gonna go somewhere.
i don't really know her yet, but i want to.
i was told she's exactly what i go for and that i would fall for her, but i didn't want to.
and i tried hard.
and i had asked God to please not let me go this road unless she likes me too because i'm sick of where it takes me.
but...she likes me...and i like her. and we're here, where we are, wanting to see where it goes, cautiously guarding but patiently hoping.
so many amazing things about what's going on. very hard to describe. i do a lot of just sitting and being still and quiet and thinking about it all. there have been a few times where i'm simply overwhelmed by it all, in a good way.
i hope we meet and hit it off. this can work. i'm going to do all i can to help that happen.
hmm.

my computer sits on the desk to the left of my monitor. there's this part on a simpsons episode where chief wiggum is giving the kids a tour of the police station and shows this board with lights on it and says "this is where the guys like to put the stickers from their fruit." being the lemming that i am, i've now put some on my computer.

ryan moves in march 3. i really do love living alone but i'm looking forward to him being here. it's not better, it's not worse, it's just different so i can't really say that i'm thinking "this will be better" or not.
there's a good chance that by sometime in march, between that and other stuff, that my life will be quite different than it was a couple weeks ago or even is now.

i've been so good with money this week. i'm really proud of myself and really hope to continue it. i stopped at this little ghetto thrift/used store on the way back from getting tortilla chips and salsa (it's a beautiful day and so i was walking). it's not like they had any good CDs or anything...there was this cool little swiveling chair that i liked. very ugly green but still. but i didn't get it.

something i was thinking about earlier today. i'm going to help this lady at church do the inventory for the little bookstore there, since i used to be in that business and all (though this is hardly a business, just a few icons and resources people can buy). anyway, i did tell her that i would help her, but she said that this thursday is when she wants to do it ( i would come early before seekers class). i told her that i wanted to and maybe will but i may have out-of-town company, in which case i'd not be able to. she was cool with it and everything...so that's not the actual point or deal. but i got thinking about something i've thought about before and know about myself. i'm not really a person who makes promises. now, i don't see myself as or intend to be some sneaky sonofabitch who weasels out of everything and lacks the ability to be dependable. it's just that...i don't want to promise something and then not follow through on it. i'm the type of person who would say "well, maybe i'll show up" and kind of annoy people, i guess, but then sometimes shows up. as opposed to the person who says "i'll be there" and you don't hear from them and they never come. i really can't stand that kind of shit, which is why i don't promise without knowing for sure that i'll do it or work my ass off trying. i hate letting people down...which sucks because my parents like to play that card...but i really just don't like when people say they'll do something and you trust them and then they don't. so anyway, to any of those out there who might get annoyed when i won't say for sure if i will or not, i'm sorry...try to understand...i mean well and i'm just trying to make sure i don't let you down. and if i do say something for sure or promise it, then that means you've got someone who's gonna do whatever it takes to make that happen or pass out trying.

anyway, to end on a lighter note...these 2 kids were playing outside my door a while ago. they kept looking in and i caught them, hahaha. so fun. gotta love the kids. i love this neighborhood.