My phone is turned off right now. i had to get my own account and number, so between the time the guys who lived here before officially disconnected and the time when the phone company gets around to activating my account (which i set up last week), i'm without phone access. as a result, this blog will be uploaded sometime today but not immediately. it's almost 9:30am right now. One of the first things i automatically want to write about is my job search, but there's a bit of a change in thinking regarding that. Yesterday (i'm tending to use capitals today and i'm not sure Why) was the day to start going full-blast job-searching; i had done some last week but was mostly busy getting this apartment joel-ized. sunday night i bought a paper from a newstand because the best job listings are there. unfortunately, it was dark and i didn't realize all that was in the box was a copy of saturday's, so yesterday i called the newspaper office to find out where i could get a copy of sunday's. the lady told me that walgreens would have them but that since i'd paid for a sunday paper, they'd deliver one. i'm watching my money but another 1.50 isn't going to break me, especially when it is to help me find a job, but i figured that i may as well sit tight and wait for them to bring me one since she said they would. well, i waited til 4pm and no paper. i called again and ended up going to a gas station a few blocks away and picking one up, then got started on job listings. However, that story is subordinate to what happened and what i learned. i did some house-arranging stuff and actually made lunch, but then decided to read a book i've meant to start for a while. it is one that i knew would be of much enrichment spiritually and would help direct me toward some answers. i read it much of the afternoon, went over some job listings, then read it to the end while the ALCS baseball game was playing on the tv. without going into too much detail, it is exactly what i needed to read right now (of course). here's where it all ties in (my writing skills absolutely suck right now, i know). lately i've been really nervous and worried and going nuts about getting a job; not just a job, but one that will be paying enough and right for me personality-wise and where i can make a difference somehow and all the other joel idealogical stuff. i've been praying a ton about it but still stressing way too much and knowing it. while i'm praying about it this morning, a really familiar verse popped into my head. the old king james version put it "seek ye first the kingdom of God and all His righteousness and all these things will be added unto you." i immediately started praying and asking God "how can i do that?" when i realized...i just had been the day before. somehow God gave me grace yesterday to read the book and not go buckwild over the job thing. yes, it's my responsibility to look and apply and get that resume out, but my bigger responsibility is to seek things of God's kingdom first...then He'll give me peace and faith and hope about it, He'll show me even more grace, He'll send the right job.
here's what to file under "things i'm realizing that God already knew":
i didn't move here because i was supposed to be with friends, though i love them and am enjoying being with them often. i didn't move here to be on my own and be independent, though it's a great step and i'm enjoying it. i moved to this place when i did to seek God's kingdom in ways i couldn't before. i've been here a week and the seeking has started.