it's just after 8am, i'm listening to jimi hendrix and sipping, no, gulping down the morning's coke.
i used to make fun of people who Had To drink coke or pepsi first thing in the morning.
that was before i gave up coffee for Lent.
if you're a reader of the Vagrant Cafe...
first of all, i'm sorry. hahaha. but really, i apologize. this is unacceptable.
i haven't heard from carter since 15 March. i'm both pissed and scared.
and starting to move ahead with zine stuff...someone has to.
i'm sick and tired of the message board. i have been for a long time. it's escalated the last couple months, though.
the vision we have and had for the magazine and obviously the message board...it's turned into the opposite of that.
once we have the zine going and regular and moving upward, things are gonna change. i've said it before, i know, but this time...really. those who should feel most welcome and comfortable there are made to feel unwelcome. and because i'm "Fair" and have to be stupid and liberal enough to try and have "free speech," the place is crawling with what i created this place to get away from.
one of the reasons i moved here and got this particular job is to have time and regain my focus. what sucks is...i did...and it was a bad time for carter to do so. a few months later, it's even more so. the thing is...i don't want my life to be spent just at some job, making enough to get by and pay some debts, doing nothing much else with my life. if i were just going to work some piddly job that doesn't use my talents, i should've just stayed where i was or taken a factory job that would leave me so tired that it would become my whole life. not that that's a horrible thing for some people, but that's not what i'm supposed to be, and i'm not going to settle for some mediocre little life. so...this is about more than running some little unimportant sucky zine, this is about more than feeling like some big shot because i "run an internet community" (i hate when people try and tell me i'm something because of it when they really have no appreciation for it and are just), this is not about trying to impress anyone...this is about fulfillment and my life and a step in where i'm headed needing to happen.
i used to make fun of people who Had To drink coke or pepsi first thing in the morning.
that was before i gave up coffee for Lent.
if you're a reader of the Vagrant Cafe...
first of all, i'm sorry. hahaha. but really, i apologize. this is unacceptable.
i haven't heard from carter since 15 March. i'm both pissed and scared.
and starting to move ahead with zine stuff...someone has to.
i'm sick and tired of the message board. i have been for a long time. it's escalated the last couple months, though.
the vision we have and had for the magazine and obviously the message board...it's turned into the opposite of that.
once we have the zine going and regular and moving upward, things are gonna change. i've said it before, i know, but this time...really. those who should feel most welcome and comfortable there are made to feel unwelcome. and because i'm "Fair" and have to be stupid and liberal enough to try and have "free speech," the place is crawling with what i created this place to get away from.
one of the reasons i moved here and got this particular job is to have time and regain my focus. what sucks is...i did...and it was a bad time for carter to do so. a few months later, it's even more so. the thing is...i don't want my life to be spent just at some job, making enough to get by and pay some debts, doing nothing much else with my life. if i were just going to work some piddly job that doesn't use my talents, i should've just stayed where i was or taken a factory job that would leave me so tired that it would become my whole life. not that that's a horrible thing for some people, but that's not what i'm supposed to be, and i'm not going to settle for some mediocre little life. so...this is about more than running some little unimportant sucky zine, this is about more than feeling like some big shot because i "run an internet community" (i hate when people try and tell me i'm something because of it when they really have no appreciation for it and are just), this is not about trying to impress anyone...this is about fulfillment and my life and a step in where i'm headed needing to happen.
posted by Joel @ 4/15/2002 06:41:00 AM
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