i think one of the reasons it's been a while since i updated and made it much of anything worth reading is because there are a few ideas inside of me that are boiling but really...aren't expressable. some because i'd hate myself to see those things in print...other things because right now there's simply no adequate tunnel between what's in my head and the alphabet, the language we're given to express things. or (most likely reason) "f*v the great writer" just simply doesn't know how to. i'm not really down on myself for that or anything, it's just a possibility.